Cherry Blossoms Bloom in May Part 2

"Girlfriend. Are you serious about the whole matchmaking thingy with your relatives? I'd rather spend a whole day babysitting my little nephews of terror than go meet someone chosen by a blood relation. Ugh!"

"Thanks, Lis. I'm not exactly thrilled about it either. And to prove it, I just went through two sticks of almond Magnums. And I haven't been able to write a single thing all day. And my deadline's tomorrow, so I'm pretty much screwed."

"I bet he'll turn out to be a pot-bellied, sweaty-palmed momma's boy with a bad comb-over, and he'll be the most boring conversationist ever! Don't do it, May!," her tone turned almost frantic towards the end of her rant.

My eyes rolled as I muttered in acknowledgment. I wasn't surprised by what she said.They were exactly my thoughts. But I should at least give it a try. I am dangerously close to the big 3-0 and still extremely single. If what I've been doing for the past decade hasn't been working; maybe its time to try something new?

And I told her so. She replied,"Look, May. I don't know where this sudden outflow of desperation came from, but its so not you. Don't let them get into your head. What happened to the old May with her ideals on finding 'The One'? On never settling when it comes to love?"

"Old. May. Precisely that. Lately, the days have been whizzing past so fast, I need to consciously calm myself before a wave of panic takes over. Sure, I had ideals when I was 20. I could afford to have ideals. But maybe ideals belong on glossy magazine covers, in between the pages of Mills and Boons, on the sets of Sex and the City, concocted to fool the ordinary citizens with their million dollar budgets and fuckin designer labels sponsors, but NOT in real life where people like you and me slog each day in mundane corporate jobs, and the only men left we get to meet who are not married or gay, usually turn out to be complete arseholes just looking for casual shags in sleazy joints or pervs who troll dating websites to satisfy their creepy hobbies. Well, fuck. I'm lonely, Lis. And if I have to resort to family match-making, then family match-make I will."

Silence. Just as I was about to check if she was still tuning in with a 'hello?', she said,"Lis, not that I have anything against you putting yourself out there. I think that's great. But there is a huge difference between being open to relationships and desperation. And what I smell from you now.. is desperation. And nothing drives men away faster than that. Oh, except deep emotional conversations and bad breath."

Great. After all these years, she decides to make sense now. Perfect...

Cherry Blossoms Bloom in May Part 1

"Aiya, May, you're not young anymore. Next year, you'll be 30! When are you going to find a man? If you don't find one soon, you'll miss the boat. Everybody will be married, and there will be no good single men left. You'll become a spinster and you'll grow old all alone!"

Sigh. Here goes again. Can't I get through the week without one person reminding me of my age and singlehood? Sure, I'm reaching 30 soon. I think its really funny how I turned 28 less than a year ago and I was already labelled within the 'almost 30 category'. Heck, maybe I should just skip 29 and turn 'almost 30' this November? That's how everyone refers to my age already anyway.

"Aunt Kim, I can't just wave a magic wand and have a handsome man appear in front of me, asking me to marry him. Sometimes its a matter of fate. I just haven't met the right one yet," I replied in exasperation.

"Right one, right one. There is no such thing as the right one. You're too fussy. That's why you're still single. Most important thing is he's rich, has a good career and takes care of you. All this talk about love is all rubbish. Love usually runs out in a marriage after the first year anyway. At most, two years. After that, what really matters is that you have a good, comfortable life when you have your own house, have children and that he gives you enough money to buy the things that you like for yourself. All that love nonsense are just lies and fairytales that make good TV and novels to fool romantics," Aunt Kim retorted.

Maybe she's right. Maybe love in real life will never be like those steamy scenes between Chuck and Blair in 'Gossip Girl' or like how the prince falls in love with Drew Barrymore in 'Ever After', or how the desperate girl actually does get the cute bartender at the end of 'He's just not that into you'. I've probably watched too much TV for my lifetime and am horribly disillusioned.

"I suppose you're right," I said reluctantly.

"Good. Then you'll join me for brunch this Saturday at Penang Village in Hartamas. I'll introduce you to Mrs. Lee, my mahjong kaki and her son. He's single, 40 years old and a GM for a local bank in KL. Stable and got money; the perfect candidate for you. Make sure you look decent! Put on a dress and some make-up. I'll see you at 11am," she finished before hanging up.

Double sigh. Do I have a choice?