Adam Lambert vs Anoop Desai vs Danny Gokey

Adam Lambert is the man to watch this season on American Idol. Yeah, he's gay. Who the fuck cares anyway. Hate all these comments saying, "He can really sing. But.. he's gay.." How the heck are those two inter-related? He can sing. Full stop. And he is different. I've seen him perform many times now and each time, he is interesting and does something surprising. Like when he slicked his hair back and wore that silver suit, singing "Tracks of My Tears" by Smokey Robinson on Motown week. He reminded me of Elvis. So handsome and his voice, amazing. It was so tender and emotional, it touched my heart. His voice is soooooo good.

Especially that part when he sang, "my smile is my makeup I wear since my break-up with you..baby baby" oh god, that was fantastic. I watched the video on youtube over and over again these past two days. How crazy is that? It's just one of those magical moments that happen once in a blue moon on Idol.

The other guy, who happens to be the underdog (not slumdog..har dee har har) is Anoop Dawg!! This guy has a pretty amazing voice too. I couldn't stand him from the start. No star charisma and honestly, just NOT GOODLOOKING and he's got cockroaches for eyebrows. And now, I'm an Anoop Dawg fan because his voice won me over. Literally, it was his voice and his voice only that totally changed my initial opinion of him and that really means something. That boy can really sing. And I became a true Anoop Dawg supporter when I heard his "Oooh Baby Baby" version on Motown week. Again, been listening to it over and over again on Youtube and its been playing in my head for the past 2 days.

Danny Gokey. Well, I really liked him at the beginning. But now, he's kinda boring me to death. I hope he does something different other than just giving his saccharine sweet smile each time. And his voice, its good. But it still hasn't really touched my heart and I have yet to experience a magical, Youtube-marathon-inducing moment yet. Sorry.

Huge Padded White Feet

Have I ever mentioned that I keep rabbits and a dog? My fat, furry friend has a huge butt and likes to hop around the house with his huge, padded, white feet. He likes to tease the dog because he knows the dog gets all jealous when he gets to roam about the house while the doggie is kept on a leash. He goes real close.. hoppity hop.. but just far enough so the flustered doggie can't reach him and starts to whine and yelp.

The naughty ball of fur hops around the house and likes to hide under the sofa. We have to hide all the wires cos bunnies love to chew on wires and can really cause havoc when left unattended. My other rabbit was a real terror when we first brought her back. She cut off our telephone line and even caused a blackout. Hahaha.. it makes me laugh when I think back on what a mischievious little bunny she was. My parents weren't quite so amused then though..

Anyway, did you know rabbits can be trained? My big, fat white one which we allow to roam the house at times is toilet-trained. He only poops when he's back in his cage. And he can beg and ask for food. He used to come round to the kitchen and step on our toes with his huge, soft feet; then stand up on his hind legs with his little front paws in front of him, begging for bread. Naughty furball!

Me bunnies are pretty old now though. I think one's 6 and the other's 7. Pretty long-lived eh? I guess that means they've been pretty happy and well-fed so far.

Dependant Bro Gets a Job

Bro finally got a job! Yes, it's true (Superhero, there is hope!). Recently, bro had been meeting up with some of his old buddies whom he's been hanging out with since he was a boy. He hooked up with, or maybe they hooked him up with, a former classmate who was looking for someone to manage his cafe cum hobby store. I'm quite surprised my bro actually agreed to take up the job (after much, MUCH cajoling, pushing and at some points, threatening) since it actually involves customer service and marketing.

I guess he knew he had to get himself on his feet because we (my mom and I) really meant business this time and put him on a shoestring budget. Come to think of it, I should be really happy that he has finally found himself a job. But its just that I've been let down so many times and I'm so tired of his irresponsibility that I don't feel very celebratory. I feel like, I need to see it actually happen before I start to count my chickens.

Nowadays I don't really give in to his demands anymore. He used to depend on me on so many things. Needs to be fetched here and there; needs to be accompanied for the simplest things like getting a haircut or grocery shopping; and needs me to rack my brains and do research for him when he needs information for something. Thinking about all that makes my blood start to boil again! Nowadays I just tell him off, "Can't you do that yourself??", "Do you need me around when you have your haircut?", and "NO!!"

I think he is starting to learn not to take us for granted anymore. Probably cos we can be quite cold and blunt towards him whenever he tries to ask for favours or money. It was difficult for me at first, but I had to. Keeping a smile and trying to be all "we're a family" when I felt so resentful and unfairly-treated (because I kept thinking why should I work my ass off to support him being a lazy good-for-nothing) inside, it just ate away at me. Things really changed for the better when I began to express how I really felt and he started to get punished for his heckcares attitude instead. This way, he learned and it got him off his butt.

Anyway, although I still don't feel overcome with happiness for the time being, I know that a burden will be lifted off my shoulders the minute he stops being financially dependant on me=)

Conceit

"A conceited person never gets anywhere because he thinks he is already there."

"To attempt to advise conceited people is like whistling against the wind."

"We often boast that we are never bored, but yet we are so conceited that we do not perceive how often we bore others."

"A man who overindulges lives in a dream. He becomes conceited. He thinks the whole world revolves around him; and it usually does."

Free Me from this Cage

He says : I really, really, really like you. You're so mysterious. Sometimes you say so much and sometimes you don't say anything.

She says : Mysterious? There's nothing mysterious about me. SoMoner or later, you will get to know me and you'll find there's nothing different about me.

He says : No, no, no.

She says : Yes, and I know what kind of person you are if you like mysterious. You're someone who gets bored easily and you're always looking for something new, am I right?

He says (or rather confesses) : Yes, I do get bored easily sometimes.

She nods triumphantly.

He says : But you are so different from other girls. You're so mysterious, I'll always find you interesting.

She says : Look, I'm not interesting. The reason I'm mysterious is because I don't have a strong personality. I don't really know what I want and that's why you find me mysterious.

He says : No. No. I don't know why you are not confident. You are so pretty and you are so smart. I don't know why you are not confident.

She says : No, it's the truth. I'm just saying the truth.

He says : You are so pretty and you are so smart. You know, I would marry you. If I took you to meet my mother, she would love you.

She says : Ha, ha, ha.

He says : You know what? When I first saw you, you were all I saw. You are so pretty. And we may never see each other again but I will never forget you. I will never forget you.

She says : Oh, come on. Did you just put that together for a script?

He says : No, No! I'm never spontaneous. I'm terrible at spontaneous. But I'm telling you, I will never forget you. You are the only girl I have met that really caught my attention these last five years. And we may never see each other again but I will never forget you.

What he says, it rings in my ears. It started out as a vacation by the beach. Nothing came out of this chance meeting. But I think I will change a lot after this short holiday. Being repressed and inhibited, I feel suddenly so exposed because of what he said, and some cruel words that have been said by others. A mixture of revelations landed on me and left me in a mess these past two days.

I think I will learn a lot from this vacation and that I will emerge a better person from it. Repressed and inhibited. These are two words I will work to banish from my life from now on. I want to be free.

Phantom of the Opera

Just watched Phantom and The Opera on TV just now. Strange how I've seen it, what three, four times now; but it really touched me tonight. I just realised how magical some of the scenes were. The part when the Phantom and Christine held each other while the flames burned around them (the billowing red pieces of cloth on stage anyway) and gosh, I almost forgot to breathe when they sang "The Point of No Return" so passionately while poor handsome Raoul stared at them teary-eyed (consumed with jealousy methinks). And the lyrics! They were singing this as they slowly walked towards each other on the bridge..

Past all thought of right or wrong
One final question
How long should we two wait before we're one?

When will the blood begin to race
The sleeping bud burst into bloom
When will the flames at last CONSUME us?

MAN!! And the censorship authorities missed this?? How hot are these words!!! No need for ripping off of clothes and rolling about on bed in the nude, the words say it all. Just so much passion and class. And the fantastic emotion that Raoul displayed on his face (swoon!) - unbelievably heart wrenching to see him so in love with Christine and how it crushed his heart to see her totally hypnotised and seduced by the phantom. Love that scene! Great acting, Patrick Wilson, you hunk of a man you.

And Gerard Butler, dammit. His expressions as he watched Christine slowly fall in love with Raoul. Especially when he feels betrayed by her and starts to weep. Gawd!! My heart ached for him. He was just so tortured and helpless; he couldn't help being the violent person that he was because he was so unloved and deprived; he felt so ugly.

And hail to Andrew Lloyd Webber, for creating magical music that touched my soul. I swear that "All I ask of you" song was written to make people fall in love. Or to make all single people cry. Christine and Raoul fell in love as they sang this song. Sigh, what a beautiful couple they make. Emily Rossum, you know I hate you cos you're so lovely.

Then the phantom also sings his own part of the song but with a soft, sad touch because he knows his love is unrequitted. He sings:

Say you'll share with me
One love, one lifetime
Lead me, save me from my solitude
Say you want me
With you here
Beside you
Anywhere you go
Let me go too

Enough already! How much can one's heart take? And the final bit with the rose and diamond ring that were left on her final resting place. Touched me to the centre of my SOUL.

You know, for a long time I hated Christine because I always thought she was a heartless b*tch who left the Phantom after she found out he was ugly. I realise now that she couldn't be with him because he was kind of insane and murderous. But the thing that really gets to me is that Phantom became like that because of the way he grew up; being treated like a monster by his own mother and all. And he sort of became a "damaged" person who couldn't control himself and didn't know how to love.

Thumbs up to this all time classic. Great actors, great music. Tragic, touching and so, so much romance. Luv-ly!!