2009 Resolutions

New Year's is just round the corner and its time to make my resolutions once again. Resolutions are important to me because when I set it out properly in words, I work towards it through the year and usually, achieve it. Last year, I didn't set out any and so this year, I'm making an effort to make my resolutions.

1) To be less judgmental
2) To complain and criticize less, listen more
3) To concentrate on my career, work hard but stay humble
4) To eradicate GOSSIPING
5) To be firm towards family about financial matters
6) To work out at least once a week (work starts next week, I'm being practical)
7) To pick up 1 hobby (tennis/dance/something artsy)
8) To double my savings by end of 2009 (considering my measly savings, its not tough)
9) To work on my website
10) To work on writing a story, short or long, just get started
11) To be more patient and easy-going with family (basically, stay out of the shit unless I'm really, really, REALLY forced to be involved)
12) Date, for heaven's sake, just bloody hell date. I don't have to marry the guy!

And last of all,

13) Just be gentle to myself, love myself, accept myself and always work towards happiness rather than some other superficial goal.

2 more days to a new year..

Pay Your Own Rent

There was a small achievement despite me going all nuts PMSing and all. The whole family finally got so sick of my bro being a jobless good-for-nothing that this time, that when he asked for 2 months rent that he was owing, we all said NO!! And he had to go borrow it from his friends. HAH! So now he HAS to find a job since he has to repay his friends and figure out how to pay next month's rent.

Now, I still give him some weekly allowance. But its really low so that he can only just afford 3 meals a day. If he buys cigarettes, he has to skip a meal. I'm so glad we don't stay together now cos I have so little patience, I can't have a decent conversation with him for longer than 5 minutes. I hate being a bitch but its total bullshit that I'm made to feel bad for not helping him when its him who's not helping himself.

PMS + conscience = self-destruction

I feel pretty rotten right now cos I just came back from a snapping match with my brother. Two of my brothers are unemployed and what pisses me off is that whenever I try to advise them, they get stubborn and defensive, which makes me angry and I start to snap at them and then, they snap back at me. So I get the opposite effect in the end.

At times like these, I wonder why I even bother at all? Why do I make myself care when they themselves don't? Frankly, most of the time, I hate to bring it up. I tell myself that I can't give up, that I should encourage them because its best for them.. but shit, who made me this family's champion? I should just sit back and concentrate on myself. Heck, I haven't even started my new job or made a name for myself or even enough savings to support myself longer than 3 months.

Anyway, I get all riled up, they stay the same. I don't give a shit, they stay the same. So WHY DO I CARE??

I said some things today that really makes me feel rotten now. I keep going, why did I say that? why did I act like that? Why do I act like I'm so much better than them? And I am just so BLOODY SICK of my own conscience.

Lorraine Hahn Marries

Lorraine Hahn, 40-something TV presenter and journalist got married with Michael Wang, a successful and distinguished-looking architect in November this year. What a great example of an independant, successful, smart and beautiful woman who doesn't settle for anything less than true love! Well, that's how I see her anyway. There's no doubt that Hahn is a gorgeous lady and I am so certain that she had dozens of admirers. But I bet she's one of those types who has a ball being single and just happened to fall in love so she had to give up her singlehood.

GIRL POWER, PEOPLE!! It's never too late to find love and we really shouldn't have to settle just to live up to society's expectations. We should all celebrate singlehood if that's where the winds of fate takes us. Lorraine, you go, girl!

Back Home & Hired

Quite a lot has happened since I left my workplace. I came back to KL to attend a wedding and spend the week with my family. I was just casually looking through the papers when I saw an ad for a full-time writing position in a magazine publishing company. I called up the number and was asked to go to the office the next morning to do a writing test. I went with no expectations whatsoever and ended up spending 2 hours filling up pages of repetitive essay questions which frankly, got a little on my nerves. I kept thinking silently to myself that this had better be worth my time!

Well, it was. At the end of the test, I was told to wait as I was going to be interviewed by the boss! Anyway, to cut a long story short, the magazine company called me up in a couple of days and offered me the job. So I'm excited. And I had better make this work or mom will.. KICK MY ASS!!

So I went back to Singapore and spent my last 2 weeks exploring all the interesting tourist spots there. It was an awesome 2 weeks. I went to the zoo, night safari, Kusu Island, Mount Faber, Sentosa Island, Fort Canning Park and totally went nuts shopping in the city! It was definitely one of the best times I ever had and I was sorry to say goodbye to the country which had been my home for the last two and a half years. But I'll be back.. to shop!

Its been 2 weeks now since I've been back in KL and I am happier than ever. Its great to be reunited with my family. I know its only a matter of time when one of us ticks the other off and starts a screaming match, but hey, that's family! I did some minor redecorating of my room and set up the tv and internet. Everything is all set now and I'm just laying back enjoying the next two weeks til I start my new job.